My New Girlfriend | Malin Akerman

7 Comments / Mar 10.09 / Celebrity, My New Girlfriend / by Worthington

My New Girlfriend is our internet girlfriend of the moment.  We kindly ask our girlfriends to please not break up with us as this is a long-term commitment and not just a one-time fling.

I’d say that on the whole, John Cho and Kal Penn have contributed very little to my life. But the one vaunted contribution that they did make to my life is unquantifiable, like the enjoyment I get when eating a bag of peanut M&Ms or putting on socks that just came out of the dryer. Those loveable ethnic stoners gave me Liane, the incredibly hot wife of the hideous Bible-thumping swinger Freakshow from Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle.

I’m talking, of course, about Malin Akerman, the Canadian-Swedish bombshell that’s making comic book nerds everywhere lament their long-guarded virginity as Laurie Jupiter (aka Silk Spectre II) in the new Watchmen film. I like to think that I have a real, legitimate, actual shot at being Malin’s boyfriend because (A) I’m a comic book nerd and read Watchmen ages ago and loved it and (B) I liked her in Harold and Kumar and it wasn’t just because she rocked out with her knockers out. I have as much chance of being her boyfriend as Jimmy Fallon has at being funny*. Which is to say…sliiiiiiiimmmmmm. Better than none, eh?

But I don’t care. Meatballs, flat-pack furniture, Malin Akerman…is there anything that Sweden produces that isn’t awesome? I don’t think so. More of the future ex-Mrs. Worthington after the jump.

*That was an unintentional Burn Notice on Jimmy Fallon. I actually like the guy, and I think he has potential.

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Comments ( 7 )

Poor Summer, it was over before she knew it. Or is this some kind of blog ‘Big Love’ thing? Are you collecting them? tsk tsk

Te added these pithy words on Mar 11 09 at 1:36 am

I was gonna say “It was good while it lasted.” But then I thought, this is DEFINITELY a Big Love thing.

casanovaruffin added these pithy words on Mar 11 09 at 8:04 am

We here at the Steel Closet are equal opportunity lovers. We still save Summer an extra toothbrush for when she decides to spend the night.

Alexander Worthington iii added these pithy words on Mar 11 09 at 1:18 pm

The MNG section has been ON POINT so far.

and surprisingly nerd friendly, on a side note.

Jack Morlock added these pithy words on Mar 11 09 at 3:51 pm

Jack, we’re supernerds too. We try to tell everyone around us that we are, but for some reason they don’t take us seriously. Maybe I need to wear my Black Bolt t-shirt more often.

Alexander Worthington iii added these pithy words on Mar 11 09 at 4:12 pm

We had a conversation about how we carefully pick our new girlfriends. You are definitely not gonna see Melissa Ford or Vida Guerra on MNG. You can’t take those women to moms.

casanovaruffin added these pithy words on Mar 11 09 at 7:35 pm

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